Early Sunsets
by TeamTadgh
Summary: Edward's sudden, unexpainable covet for a young boy's blood lands him in an unwanted dillema. What would the couple do to escape the consequences of Edward's carelessness?


Late Dawns

Preface

I stared out the windshield, at the sky that had achieved such a depth of velvetiness, where the night's first stars were already beginning to glimmer feebly. It was rare- most nights would have been filled with the dull, gray light of an imminent overcast morning. My gaze averted to the haphazard formation of mushroom-shaped trees spilled along the sides, light showers of a quiet drizzle parting the concrete. My palms were gripping the steering wheel in unnecessary ardent as I let my head loll against the hard cushion of the headrest. I drilled the tips of my fingers into the satin of the ebony vinyl, digging through the leather vehemently as though that particular action would bring with it a sense of self-assurance I had attempted vainly to attain. My ragged breathing and the occasional ruffle of the verdant leaves hanging from the branches of the overhanging trees were my only companies with the exception of my inconsequential ponder. I could feel the non-existent flames which commenced to continually char my deathly parched throat, repressing it with the mere shutting of my sleepless eyes.

I could have jumped out of the car and saunter my effortless way through the gripping green maze of knee-high grass, the flapping of elks deep in the thick woods and the moans of the mountain lions not much further from the teeming jamboree of feeding bears. Just so facetiously queer, I couldn't find the strength, the sheer energy that drove me to hunt notwithstanding the thirst that had severely debilitated me. I hadn't felt such impossible poignancy, the last was getting turned into the insatiable beast and loving Bella. I wished she was here with me, the only being capable of pulling me up from this state of lethargic composure and exhorted me to run. Just run and get my hands into any living animal I had caught sight of. Get myself fed and plummet my head back into the warmth her thighs offered. The scent of her blood I had achieved full immunity to, sweet yet vexingly forbidden. My beautiful wife, her comely features, her cadaverous arms I could have so absent-mindedly snapped cleanly into two, her glassy, chocolate brown orbs. The smooth hair cascading fluidly down her back in natural chocolate-brown tresses, her friable structure clad in nothing more than her most comfy sweats. My finger tracing the outside of her full lips, her hands gliding through the deleterious alabaster covering of my arms. I wanted to drive back to her in unidentifiable haste, gunning the engine and peeling down the vacant road in less than a nanosecond. I glanced at my ambivalent reflection splayed over a fraction of the side window.

The permanent bruises were unfathomably more defined, such purple I hadn't even came across. The bones of my face were sticking out sharply against my chalky skin and my dark eyes looked vast in the sunken sockets. I couldn't face her with such a visage; I didn't want to look weak before her. Ego was unavoidable, I couldn't deny. I shut my eyes and kept my hands on the door. My hands pulled back in seemingly retort and buried themselves in the pockets of my jeans. I moaned in denial, hitting my forehead against the dashboard in outward repulsiveness. I never had the ability to assemble the rightful answers to my thread of self-queries. What had happened to me? Why am I reacting as such? I could feel the insistent scorch in my throat running in wild directions around my arms, spreading through the flesh of my legs. It had been due to my absolute negligence I couldn't deny. I had left myself to Bella's possession since the wedding about four months ago, never leaving her, never wanting to leave her. I believed today was the only chance I could hunt with Alice assisting me in the tedium of not being in a three-mile radius with Bella. She had forced Bella into a shopping spree and promised to take her back no later than midnight. It was seconds to midnight and here I was, stranded in my own skin. I could envisage Bella's obstinate, perpetual scowl the whole way alongside Alice, holding bags of Prada she didn't need to make herself look more attractive. I'd rather be with them than cogitating on my own fate.

I took a long, dragging breath of fresh air as I rolled down the windows staggeringly. My posture straightened like I had just been shot by an arrow, my eyes widened. The scent of a scatter of violets at the furthest left of the forest, the stream that created a bubbling music not far from it, the unsatisfying lions stretching their backs over the dry patch of earth and _human_. Pure, fresh and _young._ I couldn't make myself think about it, knowing too well that I was teasing myself with a pour of selfish theories of my condition. I was making it up: I couldn't simply coveted for human's blood after those years and decades of self-control that overwhelmed the weakness I had been so ashamed of. The lessons Carlisle, my creator, my father, fed me couldn't have dissipated just because I thought only human blood would fully satiated me. I shook my head, gripping the wheel vigorously. The thick, crimson liquid…so piquant yet so wrong. The taste of it still lingered in the tip of my tongue, the rich, refreshing vigor it offered. I swallowed, feeling the burning blisters even agonizing. I held my breath, not intending to pursue the betraying hunger. My chest cauterized as I forced myself to re-start the engine and escaped from this purgatory as fast as I could. My hands trembled, not inching forward. I let myself breath again, ditheringly, and the unreasonable, covetous part of me wondered if it was wrong to be afraid of this urge. I should be the insatiable beast that I was made to be…and drinking human blood would just be my nature that I shouldn't hesitate to do…

I screamed silently inside, balling my fists as tightly as I could. The scent was getting stronger, challenging my instincts as it got thicker and richer. I knew that I must not do such an inhuman, morbidly evil act for the sake of my love, and my family. But I wasn't human. I was an animal designed to kill and drink the blood of those who lived, breathed…loved. I was meant to destroy, even the most ethereal of beings. I couldn't think about Bella right then, she wasn't part of the issue. It would be just this one time, no one will ever find out. It was like killing a bunny and draining it. Simple and satisfying. Yes. It would be nothing. Just one life, I would take. Then no more.

My prey came into view no more than a minute later, a small boy whose age I presumed was about five years old. He had the expression of a lost being, so innocent and beautiful. A child, a suitable choice for food. Fresh blood of a young inexperienced was ideal for a covetous vampire. I got out of my car noiselessly and moved slowly toward the child.

"Can I help you, boy?"

He stared up at me, relief glazing his swimming-pool blue eyes. "Yes, Mister. I got lost playing in the woods and my brother left me alone in there. I was so frightened."

_Don't, Edward. Don't do this. It's such unspeakable monstrosity. _

I smiled widely, keeping myself poised on the ground, bent toward the victim. "Well, let me drive you home. It's dangerous to be prowling around in the darkness all alone."

The child grinned, bobbing in infantile excitement. _What are you doing, Edward? He is a child, so innocent and young. Don't make yourself a beast that you aren't. _"Thank you, Mister! You are a good person."

I gazed at him, smiling. Only this once…

"Come, boy, follow me…"

-----------------------------

Fountains

Some things happen in this chapter that some readers might be disheartened to know but it is how I wanted my story to develop so just continue reading before you come into any wrong, corny conclusions. 

_I've dreamt in my life dreams that have stayed with me ever after, and changed my ideas: they've gone through and through me, like wine through water, and altered the color of my mind._

(Page 78, Wuthering Heights, Emily Bronte)

Isabella Marie Cullen

I laid on the futon in the midnight black silk nightgown I had purchased from the earlier shopping spree and gazed out the long, sash windows, firmly-closed from the unseasonable chill. It was half past one then and Edward still wasn't back yet from his hunt. He had promised he would be waiting for me in the sitting-room with a shoulder to cry on for the grueling session with Alice but he was absent when we finally arrived in the mansion, lugging the paper bags of Versace and Gucci with us. I ended up having to shower alone, which didn't last nearly as long as I had expected, and threw some cereal on a bowl for an uneventful dinner with Esme's music for company. Only Esme was in the house that night, Rosalie and Emmet were out in year-long honeymoon in Isle Esme where Edward and I had spent two weeks vacationing and Alice and Jasper were having some alone time as well out of town. Carlisle had an overtime-shift in the hospital and would only be back around two. I pitied his wife-we shared the same fate of longing, faraway love.

My hands crept down to my mid-riff, then lingered around the flat surface that once, for an immeasurable moment, caused a riot of possible and crazy scientific and cultural theories from Carlisle that morning. Edward wasn't present to witness the impossible miracle that we were going to be parents, that I was carrying what Carlisle addressed a half-vampire-half-human child in my womb. I should have been afraid, merely terrified by the abnormal accusation but I was just excited to inform the two people I loved of the news. I never wanted to envisage Charlie's reaction when I was going to tell him he was going to be a grandfather at thirty-seven when he already had a son-in law who was much, much older than him (though of course he was missed out on that piece of unnecessary information). Carlisle said that it was alright to tell him, the growth spurt of _my_ child was like any infant only his intellect was a vast difference. He had estimated that the baby would only stop maturing between the ages of seventeen or eighteen but the possibility wavered. Anything could happen in the span of nine months-including my predictable demise like all situations have landed me in before- but Carlisle was positive the pregnancy would run smoothly with perhaps a few sizeable acts of vampirism in between periods of choosing the baby's name and room-furnishing thought I would leave that whole matter to Esme. I didn't know what to expect of this-it was peculiar to the extreme, even more than finding out that Edward, _my_ husband was a vampire who didn't devour humans when I first fell irrevocably in love with him. That _my_ new family was actually a clan of sane vampires who were vegetarians. It was like being shoved with something you never thought you had wanted, you never thought could have happened.

I felt Esme's presence beneath the slightly ajar door and turned my head toward her. I smiled warmly at her and beckoned her to come in with a jerk of the head, sitting up on the cushion of the new futon Jasper had presented me as a belated wedding gift. She glided in, her creamy-white robe billowing under her feet. She was a classic vision, her wavy hair curled around her nape, her robe secured over her soft, slender waist. Her skin was the same smooth alabaster of the vampires, maroon slathered over her lips. She sank onto the futon beside me, her hand immediately taking both of mine. Her palms were frigid though a slightly toward normal room temperature.

"How are you, Bella?" she asked softly, pulling a strand of hair behind my ear.

"Fine, Esme. Really fine. I am as contented as ever," I said lamely, grinning.

She chuckled softly, the ringing of chapel bells through the hollow of a cathedral. "You do look so. You are going to be a perfect mother, I assure you, Bella, love."

I felt the blush scalding my cheeks, my lips pulling into a slight smile. "I hope so. But I am so afraid that I might not be able to see my child, take care of her, and spend my life with her and Edward."

A tiny creased formed between her eyebrows. "What do you mean, Bella?"

I wished I hadn't led this conversation this taboo topic. I had mulled over it throughout the Port Angeles trip with Alice though I didn't utter a single word of it out. I had thought over the possibility of dying in childbirth, that maybe I had been fated to die giving birth to Edward's child even before any of the vampires could have saved me. But of course, it was a maddening idea; pointless thoughts conjured in moments of boredom. I had been having a tugging feeling that something was going to occur, something that couldn't have been predicted even from Alice future-seeing abilities.

"It's crazy but I thought maybe, I would die in childbirth. Don't laugh," I asserted, scanning Esme's unreadable eyes.

She laughed, covering her lips with a palm. "Bella, love, you can be so paranoid at times. Not everything involves death and you know that. Dying in childbirth is rare, and it doesn't even happen anymore unless the mothers are in some sort of stress and has lost the will to live. Though I prefer jumping off cliffs of course than getting saved by the hottest man alive."

I couldn't help laughing with her though I really didn't have the mood. "You're lucky, Esme. To have such a nice, loving husband who understands you. Every woman deserves that. But I can't help feeling like I don't deserve this. This child in me, living and growing. You are much, much, more deserving, Esme."

"Don't ever say that, Bella. You are the most perfect woman to be carrying this child, Edward's child. He must be so happy to find out the news, overjoyed. You are going to be great parents," she assured, stroking the side of my chin softly with a single thumb.

"Thanks, Esme. Promise me you would take of the baby if anything might happen to me?" I asked, cupping a hand over hers, keeping my grip firm around her slender fingers.

She looked taken aback, as though I had just bestowed upon her the greatest of ranks. "Stop saying that, Bella. You shouldn't be so morbid. It's bad for the baby."

"Please, Esme. Just promise me," I insisted, nodding my head with a reassuring smile over my face.

She gazed at me for a long moment before hooting a silent 'yes'. I smiled appreciatively, my hands instantaneously flying to my stomach. Esme continued to scan me with expressionless eyes just as Edward came into view, his bronze hair messily tousled over his scalp, looking a tad disheveled with dark purples rimming his eyes. Esme's head cocked swiftly to the side and scrutinized him for a quick second, her marble forehead corrugated.

"Are you alright, Edward? You looked like you've just been mauled by a bear. I hope it wasn't Emmet making jokes," she questioned with lucid worry in her soft tone.

He shook his head, walking up to me. His shirt was creased but stainless, his face as handsome as ever. "No, I just explored Mount Rainier for a while. It's been a while since I did that. Where's Carlisle?"

"He has an overnight shift. He'll only be back in two. Well, I'll just leave you two alone," she muttered and kissed my cheeks briefly.

Edward stripped from his shirt and didn't bother putting on a new one. He jumped on the futon and threw his outstretched arms over my shoulders. We indulged in a immeasurable moment of deep osculation and pulled back only reluctantly, his lips still brushing against mine softly. I tried to regain my breathing, remembering that I had news to break to him. I bit my lower lip, mustering the relevant words together in an acceptably coherent speech. His lavender lids were partially closed, his lips unsmiling.

"Edward, where've you been? I was worried sick about you," I asked, pulling his chin up.

He grinned wryly, cupping my face in his hands that were as frigid as impalpable ice. "You don't have to worry about me, love."

"I have…something to tell you, Edward," I stammered, breathing in gradually.

His brows furrowed, eyes wide. "Are you alright? Are you sick, love?"

"No, no, Edward. Something wonderful has happened. I…I'm pregnant."

He stared at me in an unrelenting gaze, his body stone hard against me. I didn't speak, reticent as I brushed the tips of my fingers along the hollow of his neck. I brushed my fingers through his gnarled hair, awaiting patiently his imminent response. He didn't move, his hands still on mine. The symmetrical face was a statuesque carving of the finest granite, his eyes a varying shade of molten then, I had discerned, glassy as though he really wasn't there with me in the room. His facial expression remained unreadable, his lips unmoving. He seemed to be in a personal debate which I was involved, in deliberation to form the words I had just said into an understandable speech. I lifted a finger gingerly to his temple, then slid down the high planes of his cheekbones and traced the outline of his lips gently. He blinked once, regaining his breath and looked up at me with doubtful eyes.

"How…how did this happen?" he murmured, directing the question more to himself.

"Carlisle said that it was possible, relationships between human and vampire were rare almost impossible but we succumbed to it. He just never thought we would be faced with this so let slip the information. Our baby's going to be fine, he's going to be a talented, music prodigy like you are," I whispered, feeling his ardent hands curved around my stomach with a countenance of blatant disbelief.

"That's…that's wonderful," he mused, looking almost terrified as he pushed his lips softly against mine.

"What are we going to do?" I inquired slowly, watching the vacant sweetness of his comely visage abruptly swapped for a mixture of contentment and deliberation.

His head snapped up, his fingers dancing across my arms in celerity movements. "What do you mean? This, our baby, is a blessing. This is the happiest moment of my life, Bella, love."

I contemplated his face, at every feature I had compartmentalized in my head. I twirled a lock of his hair in a finger as he placed the side of his head gently on my stomach, perhaps capable of listening to the heartbeat of our child with his pellucid hearing. I had wanted this to happen: Edward being exultant with the news of our child. But I had also hoped to share with him the doubts that had been playing in my head, the unnecessary worries. But I wouldn't want to mar his buoyant spirits with the morbidity.

"Edward, your eyes…they're different…" I observed, noticing the golden tint had commenced to queerly fade from the irises, turning a tad of murky brown.

He shot up from the futon and stood by the arm in a no less than a blinding second. His fists were clenched by his sides, the skin stretched over his knuckles whitened, his jaw taut. "I'll go have a shower and change. Don't wait up for me."

I nodded, appalled by his sudden motion as I moved from the futon and clambered up the poster bed carefully, no wanting the fragile silk to rip into half and leant against the wooden headboard. Edward paced toward the closet though he barely looked like he was making any effort to move at all and grabbed his grey jeans and a sweatshirt, hardly gawking at the organized contents. He glanced over his shoulder to smile at me meekly and headed toward the bathroom.

Edward Anthony Masen Cullen

I slumped over the black basin beneath the toiletries cabinet and looked at myself on the impeccable mirror. My hair was a trainwreck over my scalp, my eyes turning into the shade of crimson I had so abominated. I fumbled for the contacts from the pocket of my jeans and popped in a fresh pair in the only color I could find that wasn't exactly the similar liquid molten fresh from a hunting trip. The dark bruises that had shadowed my eyes were a mere escapable grey from the eyes of a mortal. I felt the delectable strength the blood of a human provided running through my veins, the scorch in my throat swapped for a gelidness I hadn't felt for so long.

I was evil.

I twisted the faucet and splashed the warm, running water on my face. Divesting myself from my jeans, I walked into the shower, shuddering not from the cold. I stood over the shower for an immeasurable moment, repressing the sentiments swimming into my mind with more trivial matters. I wrapped a heliotrope towel below my torso and swiftly pulled up my jeans and the beige sweatshirt Esme had gotten for me two years ago for an uncalled celebration of my yet-again seventeenth birthday. I half-ran out the bathroom and slid on the vacant half of the bed. Andrena was asleep on the other side, her chocolate-brown hair toppling over the cotton pillows, her lips slightly parted in midspeech. She must have been talking in her sleep again, I mused facetiously. I ran a thumb over her forehead, then sloped down the prominent bridge of her nose and lingered at the tip of her warm nose. I envied the modicum of equanimity she was capable of achieving in her slumber, having just a few hours to let go of the fears, the worries, and the happiness for the fantasy of her dreams. I wished I could just shut my eyes and push myself into the darkness that offered a moment of unconsciousness, to be able to share her dreams.

"_Yes, Mister. I got lost playing in the woods and my brother left me alone in there. I was so frightened."_

I tore myself from the memory forcefully, excruciatingly, and moved across to the sash windows. The vision in my head shifted to the young, beautiful boy, standing ramrod over the patch of tar with his fingers twisting strands of the loose threads from his khaki shorts. The trembling lips, so soft and red like the petals of a rose, the relief deep in his round irises. I shut my eyes, fighting the mutinous images that fought to gain control of my mind. I clutched the sides of my head, digging my fingers into my scalp without drawing blood. I caught sight of untamed monster splayed over the panes, eyes wide with an inhuman glare. I stared back, unwilling to be scorched by the ferocity of the gaze. The smell of his blood, saturated in the surrounding air, my throat bursting into uncontrollable flames. My thoughts of Bella, Carlisle, Esme and my family all were diminished by the cupidity which dominated my sanity. I could have handled it better, if I had been so wildly selfish. I threw myself against the wall, breathing hard as I twisted my fist into the marble tile; the force I had attained was unpredictably stronger.

"Edward, dear?"

I looked up from the hole I had managed to create on through the marble to Esme who was hovering over the threshold with an expression of mild curiosity etching her flawlessly beautiful face. Esme…I had disappointed her with my temerarious acts. I had turned into a savage, heartless beast. Could Alice have known of my monstrous, ignoble performance? That was impossible, I had ensured. I had managed to block her invading mind. I stood and tottered to the door, my heart ought to be beating in my throat of it was of use.

"Yes, Esme?" I croaked, facing her with such little dignity that was left.

"Are you alright, Edward? You look…unlike you," she said, her hands clasped together.

"I'm okay, Esme. Just the news that I was going to be a father shook me a little," I lied, sounding particularly convincing as I stepped out to the hallway to avoid waking Bella up.

"Well, it is no normal news to hear that you could father a child. But everything's going to be alright. Carlisle has known about this for a considerably long time but he just never thought it was a necessity to tell you. Take good care of Bella, Edward," Esme assured, patting my arm softly.

It was arduous to avoid telling the truth to Esme. I had always viewed her as my mother though I was several years older than she was. I nodded my head thoughtfully and excused myself in. She left ditheringly toward the stairs as I closed the door gently and spun to be greeted with Bella's hands outstretched her mouth agape in a mild yawn.

"Was that Esme?" she mumbled, slouching on the mattress.

"Yup. She just wanted to check on us. Why are you awake, Bella, love?" I asked, plopping on the bed beside her.

"I just missed you, Edward," she teased, laughing softly as she put her arms around my waist and leant her head against my chest.

"You should get you rest, love,‼textarea name=bio style='width:100%'

Late Dawns

Preface

I stared out the windshield, at the sky that had achieved such a depth of velvetiness, where the night's first stars were already beginning to glimmer feebly. It was rare- most nights would have been filled with the dull, gray light of an imminent overcast morning. My gaze averted to the haphazard formation of mushroom-shaped trees spilled along the sides, light showers of a quiet drizzle parting the concrete. My palms were gripping the steering wheel in unnecessary ardent as I let my head loll against the hard cushion of the headrest. I drilled the tips of my fingers into the satin of the ebony vinyl, digging through the leather vehemently as though that particular action would bring with it a sense of self-assurance I had attempted vainly to attain. My ragged breathing and the occasional ruffle of the verdant leaves hanging from the branches of the overhanging trees were my only companies with the exception of my inconsequential ponder. I could feel the non-existent flames which commenced to continually char my deathly parched throat, repressing it with the mere shutting of my sleepless eyes.

I could have jumped out of the car and saunter my effortless way through the gripping green maze of knee-high grass, the flapping of elks deep in the thick woods and the moans of the mountain lions not much further from the teeming jamboree of feeding bears. Just so facetiously queer, I couldn't find the strength, the sheer energy that drove me to hunt notwithstanding the thirst that had severely debilitated me. I hadn't felt such impossible poignancy, the last was getting turned into the insatiable beast and loving Bella. I wished she was here with me, the only being capable of pulling me up from this state of lethargic composure and exhorted me to run. Just run and get my hands into any living animal I had caught sight of. Get myself fed and plummet my head back into the warmth her thighs offered. The scent of her blood I had achieved full immunity to, sweet yet vexingly forbidden. My beautiful wife, her comely features, her cadaverous arms I could have so absent-mindedly snapped cleanly into two, her glassy, chocolate brown orbs. The smooth hair cascading fluidly down her back in natural chocolate-brown tresses, her friable structure clad in nothing more than her most comfy sweats. My finger tracing the outside of her full lips, her hands gliding through the deleterious alabaster covering of my arms. I wanted to drive back to her in unidentifiable haste, gunning the engine and peeling down the vacant road in less than a nanosecond. I glanced at my ambivalent reflection splayed over a fraction of the side window.

The permanent bruises were unfathomably more defined, such purple I hadn't even came across. The bones of my face were sticking out sharply against my chalky skin and my dark eyes looked vast in the sunken sockets. I couldn't face her with such a visage; I didn't want to look weak before her. Ego was unavoidable, I couldn't deny. I shut my eyes and kept my hands on the door. My hands pulled back in seemingly retort and buried themselves in the pockets of my jeans. I moaned in denial, hitting my forehead against the dashboard in outward repulsiveness. I never had the ability to assemble the rightful answers to my thread of self-queries. What had happened to me? Why am I reacting as such? I could feel the insistent scorch in my throat running in wild directions around my arms, spreading through the flesh of my legs. It had been due to my absolute negligence I couldn't deny. I had left myself to Bella's possession since the wedding about four months ago, never leaving her, never wanting to leave her. I believed today was the only chance I could hunt with Alice assisting me in the tedium of not being in a three-mile radius with Bella. She had forced Bella into a shopping spree and promised to take her back no later than midnight. It was seconds to midnight and here I was, stranded in my own skin. I could envisage Bella's obstinate, perpetual scowl the whole way alongside Alice, holding bags of Prada she didn't need to make herself look more attractive. I'd rather be with them than cogitating on my own fate.

I took a long, dragging breath of fresh air as I rolled down the windows staggeringly. My posture straightened like I had just been shot by an arrow, my eyes widened. The scent of a scatter of violets at the furthest left of the forest, the stream that created a bubbling music not far from it, the unsatisfying lions stretching their backs over the dry patch of earth and _human_. Pure, fresh and _young._ I couldn't make myself think about it, knowing too well that I was teasing myself with a pour of selfish theories of my condition. I was making it up: I couldn't simply coveted for human's blood after those years and decades of self-control that overwhelmed the weakness I had been so ashamed of. The lessons Carlisle, my creator, my father, fed me couldn't have dissipated just because I thought only human blood would fully satiated me. I shook my head, gripping the wheel vigorously. The thick, crimson liquid…so piquant yet so wrong. The taste of it still lingered in the tip of my tongue, the rich, refreshing vigor it offered. I swallowed, feeling the burning blisters even agonizing. I held my breath, not intending to pursue the betraying hunger. My chest cauterized as I forced myself to re-start the engine and escaped from this purgatory as fast as I could. My hands trembled, not inching forward. I let myself breath again, ditheringly, and the unreasonable, covetous part of me wondered if it was wrong to be afraid of this urge. I should be the insatiable beast that I was made to be…and drinking human blood would just be my nature that I shouldn't hesitate to do…

I screamed silently inside, balling my fists as tightly as I could. The scent was getting stronger, challenging my instincts as it got thicker and richer. I knew that I must not do such an inhuman, morbidly evil act for the sake of my love, and my family. But I wasn't human. I was an animal designed to kill and drink the blood of those who lived, breathed…loved. I was meant to destroy, even the most ethereal of beings. I couldn't think about Bella right then, she wasn't part of the issue. It would be just this one time, no one will ever find out. It was like killing a bunny and draining it. Simple and satisfying. Yes. It would be nothing. Just one life, I would take. Then no more.

My prey came into view no more than a minute later, a small boy whose age I presumed was about five years old. He had the expression of a lost being, so innocent and beautiful. A child, a suitable choice for food. Fresh blood of a young inexperienced was ideal for a covetous vampire. I got out of my car noiselessly and moved slowly toward the child.

"Can I help you, boy?"

He stared up at me, relief glazing his swimming-pool blue eyes. "Yes, Mister. I got lost playing in the woods and my brother left me alone in there. I was so frightened."

_Don't, Edward. Don't do this. It's such unspeakable monstrosity. _

I smiled widely, keeping myself poised on the ground, bent toward the victim. "Well, let me drive you home. It's dangerous to be prowling around in the darkness all alone."

The child grinned, bobbing in infantile excitement. _What are you doing, Edward? He is a child, so innocent and young. Don't make yourself a beast that you aren't. _"Thank you, Mister! You are a good person."

I gazed at him, smiling. Only this once…

"Come, boy, follow me…"

-----------------------------

Colder Fountains

Some things happen in this chapter that some readers might be disheartened to know but it is how I wanted my story to develop so just continue reading before you come into any wrong, corny conclusions. 

_I've dreamt in my life dreams that have stayed with me ever after, and changed my ideas: they've gone through and through me, like wine through water, and altered the color of my mind._

(Page 78, Wuthering Heights, Emily Bronte)

Isabella Marie Cullen

I laid on the futon in the midnight black silk nightgown I had purchased from the earlier shopping spree and gazed out the long, sash windows, firmly-closed from the unseasonable chill. It was half past one then and Edward still wasn't back yet from his hunt. He had promised he would be waiting for me in the sitting-room with a shoulder to cry on for the grueling session with Alice but he was absent when we finally arrived in the mansion, lugging the paper bags of Versace and Gucci with us. I ended up having to shower alone, which didn't last nearly as long as I had expected, and threw some cereal on a bowl for an uneventful dinner with Esme's music for company. Only Esme was in the house that night, Rosalie and Emmet were out in year-long honeymoon in Isle Esme where Edward and I had spent two weeks vacationing and Alice and Jasper were having some alone time as well out of town. Carlisle had an overtime-shift in the hospital and would only be back around two. I pitied his wife-we shared the same fate of longing, faraway love.

My hands crept down to my mid-riff, then lingered around the flat surface that once, for an immeasurable moment, caused a riot of possible and crazy scientific and cultural theories from Carlisle that morning. Edward wasn't present to witness the impossible miracle that we were going to be parents, that I was carrying what Carlisle addressed a half-vampire-half-human child in my womb. I should have been afraid, merely terrified by the abnormal accusation but I was just excited to inform the two people I loved of the news. I never wanted to envisage Charlie's reaction when I was going to tell him he was going to be a grandfather at thirty-seven when he already had a son-in law who was much, much older than him (though of course he was missed out on that piece of unnecessary information). Carlisle said that it was alright to tell him, the growth spurt of _my_ child was like any infant only his intellect was a vast difference. He had estimated that the baby would only stop maturing between the ages of seventeen or eighteen but the possibility wavered. Anything could happen in the span of nine months-including my predictable demise like all situations have landed me in before- but Carlisle was positive the pregnancy would run smoothly with perhaps a few sizeable acts of vampirism in between periods of choosing the baby's name and room-furnishing thought I would leave that whole matter to Esme. I didn't know what to expect of this-it was peculiar to the extreme, even more than finding out that Edward, _my_ husband was a vampire who didn't devour humans when I first fell irrevocably in love with him. That _my_ new family was actually a clan of sane vampires who were vegetarians. It was like being shoved with something you never thought you had wanted, you never thought could have happened.

I felt Esme's presence beneath the slightly ajar door and turned my head toward her. I smiled warmly at her and beckoned her to come in with a jerk of the head, sitting up on the cushion of the new futon Jasper had presented me as a belated wedding gift. She glided in, her creamy-white robe billowing under her feet. She was a classic vision, her wavy hair curled around her nape, her robe secured over her soft, slender waist. Her skin was the same smooth alabaster of the vampires, maroon slathered over her lips. She sank onto the futon beside me, her hand immediately taking both of mine. Her palms were frigid though a slightly toward normal room temperature.

"How are you, Bella?" she asked softly, pulling a strand of hair behind my ear.

"Fine, Esme. Really fine. I am as contented as ever," I said lamely, grinning.

She chuckled softly, the ringing of chapel bells through the hollow of a cathedral. "You do look so. You are going to be a perfect mother, I assure you, Bella, love."

I felt the blush scalding my cheeks, my lips pulling into a slight smile. "I hope so. But I am so afraid that I might not be able to see my child, take care of her, and spend my life with her and Edward."

A tiny creased formed between her eyebrows. "What do you mean, Bella?"

I wished I hadn't led this conversation this taboo topic. I had mulled over it throughout the Port Angeles trip with Alice though I didn't utter a single word of it out. I had thought over the possibility of dying in childbirth, that maybe I had been fated to die giving birth to Edward's child even before any of the vampires could have saved me. But of course, it was a maddening idea; pointless thoughts conjured in moments of boredom. I had been having a tugging feeling that something was going to occur, something that couldn't have been predicted even from Alice future-seeing abilities.

"It's crazy but I thought maybe, I would die in childbirth. Don't laugh," I asserted, scanning Esme's unreadable eyes.

She laughed, covering her lips with a palm. "Bella, love, you can be so paranoid at times. Not everything involves death and you know that. Dying in childbirth is rare, and it doesn't even happen anymore unless the mothers are in some sort of stress and has lost the will to live. Though I prefer jumping off cliffs of course than getting saved by the hottest man alive."

I couldn't help laughing with her though I really didn't have the mood. "You're lucky, Esme. To have such a nice, loving husband who understands you. Every woman deserves that. But I can't help feeling like I don't deserve this. This child in me, living and growing. You are much, much, more deserving, Esme."

"Don't ever say that, Bella. You are the most perfect woman to be carrying this child, Edward's child. He must be so happy to find out the news, overjoyed. You are going to be great parents," she assured, stroking the side of my chin softly with a single thumb.

"Thanks, Esme. Promise me you would take of the baby if anything might happen to me?" I asked, cupping a hand over hers, keeping my grip firm around her slender fingers.

She looked taken aback, as though I had just bestowed upon her the greatest of ranks. "Stop saying that, Bella. You shouldn't be so morbid. It's bad for the baby."

"Please, Esme. Just promise me," I insisted, nodding my head with a reassuring smile over my face.

She gazed at me for a long moment before hooting a silent 'yes'. I smiled appreciatively, my hands instantaneously flying to my stomach. Esme continued to scan me with expressionless eyes just as Edward came into view, his bronze hair messily tousled over his scalp, looking a tad disheveled with dark purples rimming his eyes. Esme's head cocked swiftly to the side and scrutinized him for a quick second, her marble forehead corrugated.

"Are you alright, Edward? You looked like you've just been mauled by a bear. I hope it wasn't Emmet making jokes," she questioned with lucid worry in her soft tone.

He shook his head, walking up to me. His shirt was creased but stainless, his face as handsome as ever. "No, I just explored Mount Rainier for a while. It's been a while since I did that. Where's Carlisle?"

"He has an overnight shift. He'll only be back in two. Well, I'll just leave you two alone," she muttered and kissed my cheeks briefly.

Edward stripped from his shirt and didn't bother putting on a new one. He jumped on the futon and threw his outstretched arms over my shoulders. We indulged in a immeasurable moment of deep osculation and pulled back only reluctantly, his lips still brushing against mine softly. I tried to regain my breathing, remembering that I had news to break to him. I bit my lower lip, mustering the relevant words together in an acceptably coherent speech. His lavender lids were partially closed, his lips unsmiling.

"Edward, where've you been? I was worried sick about you," I asked, pulling his chin up.

He grinned wryly, cupping my face in his hands that were as frigid as impalpable ice. "You don't have to worry about me, love."

"I have…something to tell you, Edward," I stammered, breathing in gradually.

His brows furrowed, eyes wide. "Are you alright? Are you sick, love?"

"No, no, Edward. Something wonderful has happened. I…I'm pregnant."

He stared at me in an unrelenting gaze, his body stone hard against me. I didn't speak, reticent as I brushed the tips of my fingers along the hollow of his neck. I brushed my fingers through his gnarled hair, awaiting patiently his imminent response. He didn't move, his hands still on mine. The symmetrical face was a statuesque carving of the finest granite, his eyes a varying shade of molten then, I had discerned, glassy as though he really wasn't there with me in the room. His facial expression remained unreadable, his lips unmoving. He seemed to be in a personal debate which I was involved, in deliberation to form the words I had just said into an understandable speech. I lifted a finger gingerly to his temple, then slid down the high planes of his cheekbones and traced the outline of his lips gently. He blinked once, regaining his breath and looked up at me with doubtful eyes.

"How…how did this happen?" he murmured, directing the question more to himself.

"Carlisle said that it was possible, relationships between human and vampire were rare almost impossible but we succumbed to it. He just never thought we would be faced with this so let slip the information. Our baby's going to be fine, he's going to be a talented, music prodigy like you are," I whispered, feeling his ardent hands curved around my stomach with a countenance of blatant disbelief.

"That's…that's wonderful," he mused, looking almost terrified as he pushed his lips softly against mine.

"What are we going to do?" I inquired slowly, watching the vacant sweetness of his comely visage abruptly swapped for a mixture of contentment and deliberation.

His head snapped up, his fingers dancing across my arms in celerity movements. "What do you mean? This, our baby, is a blessing. This is the happiest moment of my life, Bella, love."

I contemplated his face, at every feature I had compartmentalized in my head. I twirled a lock of his hair in a finger as he placed the side of his head gently on my stomach, perhaps capable of listening to the heartbeat of our child with his pellucid hearing. I had wanted this to happen: Edward being exultant with the news of our child. But I had also hoped to share with him the doubts that had been playing in my head, the unnecessary worries. But I wouldn't want to mar his buoyant spirits with the morbidity.

"Edward, your eyes…they're different…" I observed, noticing the golden tint had commenced to queerly fade from the irises, turning a tad of murky brown.

He shot up from the futon and stood by the arm in a no less than a blinding second. His fists were clenched by his sides, the skin stretched over his knuckles whitened, his jaw taut. "I'll go have a shower and change. Don't wait up for me."

I nodded, appalled by his sudden motion as I moved from the futon and clambered up the poster bed carefully, no wanting the fragile silk to rip into half and leant against the wooden headboard. Edward paced toward the closet though he barely looked like he was making any effort to move at all and grabbed his grey jeans and a sweatshirt, hardly gawking at the organized contents. He glanced over his shoulder to smile at me meekly and headed toward the bathroom.

Edward Anthony Masen Cullen

I slumped over the black basin beneath the toiletries cabinet and looked at myself on the impeccable mirror. My hair was a trainwreck over my scalp, my eyes turning into the shade of crimson I had so abominated. I fumbled for the contacts from the pocket of my jeans and popped in a fresh pair in the only color I could find that wasn't exactly the similar liquid molten fresh from a hunting trip. The dark bruises that had shadowed my eyes were a mere escapable grey from the eyes of a mortal. I felt the delectable strength the blood of a human provided running through my veins, the scorch in my throat swapped for a gelidness I hadn't felt for so long.

I was evil.

I twisted the faucet and splashed the warm, running water on my face. Divesting myself from my jeans, I walked into the shower, shuddering not from the cold. I stood over the shower for an immeasurable moment, repressing the sentiments swimming into my mind with more trivial matters. I wrapped a heliotrope towel below my torso and swiftly pulled up my jeans and the beige sweatshirt Esme had gotten for me two years ago for an uncalled celebration of my yet-again seventeenth birthday. I half-ran out the bathroom and slid on the vacant half of the bed. Andrena was asleep on the other side, her chocolate-brown hair toppling over the cotton pillows, her lips slightly parted in midspeech. She must have been talking in her sleep again, I mused facetiously. I ran a thumb over her forehead, then sloped down the prominent bridge of her nose and lingered at the tip of her warm nose. I envied the modicum of equanimity she was capable of achieving in her slumber, having just a few hours to let go of the fears, the worries, and the happiness for the fantasy of her dreams. I wished I could just shut my eyes and push myself into the darkness that offered a moment of unconsciousness, to be able to share her dreams.

"_Yes, Mister. I got lost playing in the woods and my brother left me alone in there. I was so frightened."_

I tore myself from the memory forcefully, excruciatingly, and moved across to the sash windows. The vision in my head shifted to the young, beautiful boy, standing ramrod over the patch of tar with his fingers twisting strands of the loose threads from his khaki shorts. The trembling lips, so soft and red like the petals of a rose, the relief deep in his round irises. I shut my eyes, fighting the mutinous images that fought to gain control of my mind. I clutched the sides of my head, digging my fingers into my scalp without drawing blood. I caught sight of untamed monster splayed over the panes, eyes wide with an inhuman glare. I stared back, unwilling to be scorched by the ferocity of the gaze. The smell of his blood, saturated in the surrounding air, my throat bursting into uncontrollable flames. My thoughts of Bella, Carlisle, Esme and my family all were diminished by the cupidity which dominated my sanity. I could have handled it better, if I had been so wildly selfish. I threw myself against the wall, breathing hard as I twisted my fist into the marble tile; the force I had attained was unpredictably stronger.

"Edward, dear?"

I looked up from the hole I had managed to create on through the marble to Esme who was hovering over the threshold with an expression of mild curiosity etching her flawlessly beautiful face. Esme…I had disappointed her with my temerarious acts. I had turned into a savage, heartless beast. Could Alice have known of my monstrous, ignoble performance? That was impossible, I had ensured. I had managed to block her invading mind. I stood and tottered to the door, my heart ought to be beating in my throat of it was of use.

"Yes, Esme?" I croaked, facing her with such little dignity that was left.

"Are you alright, Edward? You look…unlike you," she said, her hands clasped together.

"I'm okay, Esme. Just the news that I was going to be a father shook me a little," I lied, sounding particularly convincing as I stepped out to the hallway to avoid waking Bella up.

"Well, it is no normal news to hear that you could father a child. But everything's going to be alright. Carlisle has known about this for a considerably long time but he just never thought it was a necessity to tell you. Take good care of Bella, Edward," Esme assured, patting my arm softly.

It was arduous to avoid telling the truth to Esme. I had always viewed her as my mother though I was several years older than she was. I nodded my head thoughtfully and excused myself in. She left ditheringly toward the stairs as I closed the door gently and spun to be greeted with Bella's hands outstretched her mouth agape in a mild yawn.

"Was that Esme?" she mumbled, slouching on the mattress.

"Yup. She just wanted to check on us. Why are you awake, Bella, love?" I asked, plopping on the bed beside her.

"I just missed you, Edward," she teased, laughing softly as she put her arms around my waist and leant her head against my chest.

"You should get you rest, love," I murmured though I really didn't want her to go back to sleep and leave me alone, attending to the pernicious thoughts.

"I'm scared, Edward…"

I buried my nose in her hair as I felt her tracing one warm fingertip around the contours of my chest. "Why, love?"

"I'm afraid of so many unimaginable things that you would laugh at. I'm scared of childbirth, I'm scared of having to raise our baby, I'm scared I won't be able to hold him in my arms and look at him, I'm scared I won't be able to spend the rest of my life with the people I love, I'm afraid of dying…"

"Why are you saying this, love? Of course you'll be able to do all that. I'm going to be here if anything ever happens to you. I won't let anything bad happen to you, remember, Bella," I snapped firmly, holding her elbows in my grasp, never wanting to let go.

She chortled softly though I didn't find the humor in any part of the conversation. "Edward, dear, anything can happen. And sometimes we're just not fast enough to react and we'll have to learn to let go someday."

"You're talking nonsense, Bella. Stop this instance and I won't hear any of it anymore," I retorted, lifting a finger to the center of her full lips.

She held my hand and mouthed the words, "I love you". Her image was imprinted on my retinas permanently and I knew she was thinking of those stupid things I couldn't have known despite my ability to read people's minds. My power was impotent with her yet nothing was more prosaic than not having her in my life. She was the oasis to my thirst…and yet I had so astringently killed, devoured an unknowing human, a child.

_Monster. You're an insatiable beast, Edward! How would you atone to your sins? By having the most beautiful woman in your life who's carrying your child? Imbecile, you truly are, Edward. _

"Edward? What are you thinking about? You look so…serious and scary," she joked, soughing slightly as she trailed the greenish stream of veins that snaked through my arm, the sleeves of my sweatshirt rolled to the crease of my elbows.

"Nothing, love," I muttered and hummed her lullaby under my breath, holding her in my arms.

She put my hands over her stomach, moving them in wide circles as she breathed slowly through her nostrils. We were huddled together in pointed silences, my humming the only source for company as we stared into nothingness. The macabre scenes of my previous hunt formed a little slideshow in my head on re-loop, never pausing as the nebulous images got increasingly focused. Bella's snoring was light and soothing, mollifying the spasm of panic that had triggered in me. I closed my eyes and pretended to sleep, shutting out all thoughts.

Isabella Marie Cullen

I dreamt of swirling, refulgent colors. Reds with streaks of bright pink in the centre, circles of the whites and smudges of lime greens. Wild purples rimmed in maroon. Then further into the horrification, only the greens and browns began slowly to appear, swapping for the psychedelic shades. I woke in between slight naps and lolled my head against Edward's chest. He was still, as though he was a sleeping statue. His eyes were closed, his expression composed. I fell back into the much hungered slumber, my hands secured around my child.

I was awoken by the smell of eggs wafting from the kitchen. Edward was still beneath me, his eyes open and wide as though he was witnessing a gruesome accident. He felt my body shifting slightly and blinked his eyes, greeting me with roseate smile. "Good morning, love."

"Good morning, Edward. I smell eggs," I said, stretching my arms over my head.

He grinned and gestured toward the door. Esme was flying into the room with a large tray in her hands, laden with pewter dishes of food and a jar of orange juice. She placed it over it over my legs and I bent forward to gawk at the bountiful contents. There were plates of perfectly-fried eggs, cinnamon rolls (my favorite), waffles and a bowl of cereal. I turned my head to Edward who smiled and nodded toward the cleaned utensils wrapped in a piece of serviette.

"Enjoy, my Bella," he whispered into my ear, his lips brushing gently against my helix.

"I'll just leave you guys alone. Carlisle is in his office if you need him," Esme said and left the room.

I picked up the fork and began shoving spoonfuls of egg into my mouth, Edward's hand on the small of my back. I finished two eggs in no more than a minute and chased it with two glasses of orange juice filled to the brim. Dawn was breaking over, shell pink and faintly gold from the windows. I took half over the waffles and laid back on Edward's chest, my stomach full.

"Whoa, that was some spread," I said, rubbing my stomach, stroking the three-month old bulge that had protruded from the previous night.

"Are you full?" he asked softly.

I nodded my head vigorously. "Very. So what are we going to do now?"

"Bella, I was thinking off getting a house of our own. What do you think about it?"

I was caught off guard by the question. I had never thought of living apart from my beloved family of vampires before. "I'm okay with it if you promise to make all the preparations."

"Well, I actually already did. You'll love it, Bella. Get dress and I'll show you Esme's wedding surprise."


End file.
